Beijing International Airprot – 2/27/2015
I followed the professor for a while. He was a determined walker with significantly longer legs than me. He veered left, into the men’s room, at which point I stopped following him, and the sinking feeling of my loneliness and total independence set in.
Independence is often a wonderful and pride-filled step in the life of a young adult, but first it’s terrifying. People whiz by me. There are bright signs everywhere. Nothing is familiar. I finally made it to the immigration clearance area where people were gathering in large masses. Two signs hung above me, separating the foreigners from the Chinese nationals.
The word foreigner clung to me. No matter how much I tried to avoid it, I couldn’t. As an Asian American, I have to deal with the forever foreigner complex at home in the United States. And I can’t shake the word even in my home country. I don’t want to be a foreigner here.